10 Tips on How to be a Successful Wife
1-Use your ‘Fitnah’ (beauty and overtures of allurement) to win the heart of your husband. All women have the ornaments that Allah blessed them with. Use the beauty Allah SWT has bestowed you with to win the heart of your husband. Dress up for your husband at home. Wear the colours and clothes that he likes to see you in and use makeup, perfume, jewellery - in short, whatever it takes to be attractive to him. From the early years, little girls have adorned themselves with earrings and bracelets and worn pretty dresses - as described in the Qur’an. Continue this tradition as a wife.
2-Be sensitive to his moods, feelings and needs. For example, don’t start complaining or burden him with problems as soon as he comes home; rather, welcome him and make him feel good to be home. Imagine your husband coming home to a clean house, an exquisitely dressed wife, a dinner prepared with care, children clean and sweet smelling, a clean bedroom - what would this do to his love for you? Now imagine what the opposite does to him.
3-Review the characteristics of the Hoor Al-Ayn (women of jannah), and try to imitate them. The Qur’an and Sunnah describe the women in jannah with certain characteristics. Such as the silk they wear, their large dark eyes, their singing to their husband, etc. Try it, wear silk for your husband, put Kohl in your eyes to ‘enlarge’ them, and sing to your husband.
4- Do things together or at least allocate some time of the day to give him your undivided attention. Be sincere in appreciating him, show interest in his day, his activities, his thoughts and opinions. Give him advice and comfort him when needed. Spend your husband’s money carefully and try to keep him informed of where his money is being spent. Remember not to spend large amounts of his money without his permission. Show caring and concern for his relatives as this is a sure way of securing a place in his heart. Never object when he spends on them, as this is a source of abundance in provision and increase in life span.
5-Joke and play games with your husband. A mans secret: they seek women who are light-hearted and have a sense of humour. As Rasulullah SAW told Jabir to marry someone who would make him laugh and he would make her laugh. Be cheerful and humorous, smile often, don’t feel shy to be affectionate with your husband and make him feel really happy to be around you. Express your love frequently and creatively, rather than waiting for him to do so first.
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